


love fall hurt crazy

by bang_hyerim



Series: Multifandom KPOP (requests welcome) [29]
Category: Pentagon (Korea Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Car Accidents, Enlistment, Gen, Major Character Injury, Military, Sad, Short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-19
Updated: 2020-10-19
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:56:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27106831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bang_hyerim/pseuds/bang_hyerim
Summary: Love. Fall. Hurt. Crazy.Yanan felt them all.All it once.Yet none of them at all.
Relationships: Ko Shinwon/Yang Hongseok, Yan An & Everyone
Series: Multifandom KPOP (requests welcome) [29]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1611115
Kudos: 10





	love fall hurt crazy

**Author's Note:**

> I got sloppy towards the end lol. This is a messy little draft i've had since like february. I hope you enjoy.

Love: 

Yanan felt love. 

Love for his friends, they all had done so much for him. He felt as though he could never repay them for what they had done. 

They gave him confidence. 

They gave him hope. 

And the thing he was most grateful that they gave him, 

Memories. 

_"Yanan! Yanan!" Shinwon shouted as he ran over to the boy standing outside of the gate._

_Yanan had just got back from his trip to China._

_9 months without the people he loved most._

_He hated it._

_"Hi, Hyung-ie." Yanan smiled as he wrapped his arms around Shinwon's body._

_When Shinwon finally let go he grabbed Yanan's suitcase and threw an arm over the youngers shoulder._

_"So, Yanan, tell me, how was China?" He asked as they strolled casually through the airport hallways._

_"It was okay, Grandma's food was really nice." Yanan smiled looking at Shinwon._

_"You changed your hair again." Yanan commented as they neared the exit._

_"Yeah, the dark brown was getting tiring. Yuto-ah and Hyunggu-ah tried to get me to dye it green. Those bastards." Shinwon chuckled as he heard a car honk at them._

_"Oh yeah I forgot to tell you, Hyojong-hyung and his new girlfriend are picking us up."_

_"Why? Still haven't got your license yet, hyung?" Yanan teased as the car drove up._

_"No. I haven't asshole." Shinwon grumbled opening the door for Yanan._

That was one of his favorite memories. It was simple, didn't mean much, didn't seem like much, but it was everything to Yanan. 

Because for the first time in his life, Yanan felt loved. 

Fall: 

Nothing good lasts forever. 

The love that Yanan enjoyed so much. 

It fell. 

_"Hyung?" Yanan called as he saw Shinwon and Hongseok walking in front of him._

_"Oh, Yanan!" They shouted stopping to wait for the boy ._

_Yanan jogged over to them softly, his hyungs, his fa_ _mily._

_"How are you, kid?" Hongseok asked ruffling Yanan's hair._

_"I'm okay. My Mom came home today."_

_"Oh? How'd that go?" Shinwon asked as they sat at the bus stop._

_"It was fine. She didn't hit me or Junnie." Yanan stated looking at the sky._

Oh I forgot, You guys don't know "Junnie."

Wen Junhui. 

Yanan's boyfriend. 

Well, ex-boyfriend. 

But we'll get back to that.

Fall: 

_It all happened so fast for Yanan. He could barely process it. Shinwon and Hongseok just went to cross the street to go get them some snacks._

_They didn't have to be caught in the middle of a car accident._

_They didn't have to get Yanan snacks._

_They didn't have to scream._

_They didn't have to die._

_They. Didn't. Have. To. Die._

_But they did._

_And so did Yanan._

_Yanan didn't die physically like they did._

_But his soul._

_His soul was gone._

_And no one, not even Junhui, could bring him back._

_He started avoiding the others, Jinho, Hwitaek, Changgu, Yuto, Hyunggu, Wooseok, and Junhui. He avoided all of them._

_Because he felt guilty._

_Guilty that because of him they crossed the street._

_Because of him, they didn't jump in time._

_Because of him, they were dead._

It all falls apart so fast. 

Hurt: 

He killed two of his friends. 

He lost his boyfriend.

He lost his friends. 

He lost his friends. 

And more than anything.

He lost himself. 

After the accident Yanan only ever felt two emotions. 

Hurt and Numb. 

He didn't have many memories from after the accident but there was one. It was more of a regret than a memory. 

_"Yanan. I know you won't talk to me, won't look at me, and think that you lost all of us but that's not true. We still love you, Yanan. Which is why I'm telling you this....I....Yanan-ah....I'm enlisting in three days."_

_"What?" Yanan said looking up at Jinho. It was a shock for the both of them._

_"I'm enlisting. Hwitaek and the kids are going to send me off. I wanted to invite you Yanan."_

_"Sorry, Jinho-ssi. I can't come."_

_"Why? Why can't you come, Yanan?"_

_"You know why."_

_"So what Yanan! Shinwon and Hongseok are dead! You can't do anything about it. You don't have to let it go but please...please, Yanan, come say goodbye."_

_"Goodbye, Jinho."_

_"Yan-"_

_"Goodbye, hyung."_

_"Goodbye, Dad."_

_"Goodbye, Jo Jinho." Yanan said looking at Jinho and standing up._

_"I love you, Yanan. The kids miss you."_

_"I love you too, Jinho. And tell them I miss them too."_

He should of gone to say goodbye.

Crazy:

He was done. 

Done with his life. 

With these so called "emotions." 

They were driving him crazy. 

So he left them. 

The end


End file.
